Fellow Managers, 

FANTASY BASEBALL IS BACK! 

I’m excited to announce the return of Baldelli’s Modern Life XIV. This season, we will answer important questions like, who will spend $62 on Ronald Acuna Jr. or $700,000,000 on Shohei Ohtani (pitcher)? This season features a long requested rule tweaks. Plus, we blur the line between digital and real-world fantasy by awarding a trophy for a second year and offering SWAG. You should have already received your league invite email and can sign into your teams. 

Now let’s turn to…

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Fellow Managers, 

The season has ended, a champion is crowned once more — 

Congratulations to Leo, Tokin’ Asian, on winning his fifth league championship and first since 2020. Tokin’ Asian is now the winningest manager in BML history, taking sole possession of first place from Jags, who won four straight titles between 2008-2011. 

It may feel like Tokin’ won as a playoff Cinderella because he finished the regular season in 7th place, but closer look at his head-to-head stats tell a different story. Tokin’ went 13-6-3 in weekly matchups and 7-1 in the last two months of the regular season (all wins were 5-4 or 6-4). 

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The 2023 season draft order has been selected! A big shoutout to Jamie and little Maya for helping out. Without further ado, here is the draft order for this year:

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Fellow Managers,

As we all know, life circumstances can get in the way of a manager’s ability to commit the necessary time to compete in fantasy baseball. And if you don’t feel like you’re competing then the day-to-day work of managing a team changes from fun and into a chore. I’ve been there, I know. It is important for managers to play fantasy baseball only when it’s enjoyable in the moment, and thus when it no longer squarely fits that category in their lives, they must make the right decision and step down.

With this said, I wanted to inform you all that Brain Cunningham (cc’ed), aka Cunningham, the three-season manager of 1992 City Champs, has decided to move into a reserve manager role this season and hand over the keys to another manager. He may be back someday when a new team opening emerges. We wish him all the best.

Fellow Managers,

This year’s divisions, as chosen by the 2022 division champions It’s Milk Time and Alternative Bats, in no particular order are;

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Hello Fellow Managers, 

For the first time I can recall, there was no pushback about the suggested draft date by any manager. For that reason, I’ve made it official:

Draft day is Thursday, March 23rd at 5 pm PST (8 pm EST). Email me to request the zoom link for those who would like to join live.  

Other Business: 

• League dues: They are $200, due before draft day. Many have already paid, so thank you. Contact me one way or another about the dues if you can’t make the deadline. 
• If you do not intend to play this year, let me know ASAP so I can contact our reserve managers. 
• Division Picks: Tentatively set between It’s Milk Time and Alternative Bats for March 11th. 
• Keeper Deadline: Monday, March 20th
  • Reminder about NA Keepers – Each manager may keep a player listed as NA at the end of the 2022 season for $1 instead of the keeper minimum of $5.
  • View the keeper Google Sheet

Good luck gentlemen

Commissioner

Fellow Managers, 

Because this year is the thirteenth, and thus creepiest iteration of Baldelli’s Modern Life, I asked Chat GTP to write a league intro message and freak us all out. Here’s what it wrote 🤖😱: 

“Welcome back, fantasy baseball managers! As we gear up for another season of thrills and chills on the diamond, let’s take a moment to reflect on the role of superstition in America’s favorite pastime. Some players won’t step on the foul line, others refuse to change their socks during a winning streak. And then there’s the number 13 – widely regarded as an unlucky number in many cultures, and a source of anxiety for some baseball fans. From Babe Ruth hitting his 713th home run on Friday the 13th, to the Miami Marlins losing 13-0 on September 13th, 2020, there’s no shortage of eerie coincidences surrounding this infamous digit. But fear not, my friends – with a little bit of skill and a lot of luck, we’ll conquer the baseball gods once again this year. Let’s play ball!” 

With those eerie silicon words so well said, it’s time to move on to league business.

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Fellow Managers, 

Today we crown a new league champion. CONGRATULATIONS to Nick, manager of Alternative Bats, for winning Baldelli’s Modern Life XII!  

The playoffs in ’22 were a reversal of ’21. Last year, underdogs eliminated three out of four top seeds in the first round. Alternative Bats was there, squeaking into the 8th spot. A Cinderella run ending with a loss in the championship game to Life of Ke’Bryan — a loss he swore to avenge. 

There would be no underestimating Alternative Bats this year. Nick won his division and ended the season tied for second with an overall record of 112-86-12, or .562 winning percentage. Still, to win THIS championship, Nick had to overcome a monster. For the second year, It’s Milk Time owned the best record in baseball, and it seemed no one could stop him — until one man did. 

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You may have read the news that All-Star pitcher Jacob DeGrom was added to the injured list with a “stress reaction in his right scapula” today. While he will not likely miss the entire season, he will miss “significant playing time” meaning several months. 

DeGrom was a keeper for the manager Phil is my Friend, who upon hearing of the injury, asked The Commissioner’s Office for relief. 

After requesting and receiving input from multiple managers, speaking to the affected manager, and considering the current rules, I have come to the following decision: Manager Phil is my Friend may drop Jacob DeGrom as a keeper but may not replace him with another keeper. Manager Phil is my Friend does not have to pay DeGrom’s draft price. 

The ruling has created a new precedent in case something similar happens in the future.

Hello Managers,

The division-winning managers from 2021, It’s Milk Time and CoMeesh, have drafted divisions for 2022. The results are listed below in no particular order:

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